March 10, 2005
L-l-love
Llllove. Gin and tonic induced wonderful wonderful love.
Room is spinning. Going to sleep now.
Wow. He's amazing.
wow. I'm drunk.
good lord. I have to be at work in less then eight hours.
Good lord. I'm ten years older then him.
Well....
You only live once.
Comments-[ comments.]
Room is spinning. Going to sleep now.
Wow. He's amazing.
wow. I'm drunk.
good lord. I have to be at work in less then eight hours.
Good lord. I'm ten years older then him.
Well....
You only live once.
March 08, 2005
Crushed
Crushed.
I am SO CRUSHED. I'm too old for this. Too. Old. For. This.
I love the freedom that cyberspace brings. I can yell this out and the echoes can bounce around as much as they darn well please. And 'aint no one here that knows who I am. So it's ok.
So today, when when my palms got all sweaty, when I couldn't - wouldn't look in a certain direction, at a certain person - I realized that, while it did indeed feel like I was in 6th grade again, that my best friend, sitting at a desk not far away was about to pass me a note on lined notebook paper, it was all an illusion. The headyness I was experience, difficulty concentrating, did I mention the ice cold hands? These were all by-products of the crush.
Apparently one is never too old for the crush. The completely body-freezing, mind-occupying crush. The totally Innappropriate crush. The, oh my g-d, how old are you?? Crush.
And when the desks dissolved and the conference table came into focus, and the meeting broke down into smaller groups, it came as no surprise to me that although my head was Screaming(SCREAMING) at me to do one thing, somehow I my body didn't obey and I found myself waving a limp goodbye from the elevator.
And just a few minutes later I was already thinking what I would have done differently if there could just be a rewind button. A do-over. But you only get do-overs in 6th grade. And his plane leaves tomorrow.
Comments-[ comments.]
I am SO CRUSHED. I'm too old for this. Too. Old. For. This.
I love the freedom that cyberspace brings. I can yell this out and the echoes can bounce around as much as they darn well please. And 'aint no one here that knows who I am. So it's ok.
So today, when when my palms got all sweaty, when I couldn't - wouldn't look in a certain direction, at a certain person - I realized that, while it did indeed feel like I was in 6th grade again, that my best friend, sitting at a desk not far away was about to pass me a note on lined notebook paper, it was all an illusion. The headyness I was experience, difficulty concentrating, did I mention the ice cold hands? These were all by-products of the crush.
Apparently one is never too old for the crush. The completely body-freezing, mind-occupying crush. The totally Innappropriate crush. The, oh my g-d, how old are you?? Crush.
And when the desks dissolved and the conference table came into focus, and the meeting broke down into smaller groups, it came as no surprise to me that although my head was Screaming(SCREAMING) at me to do one thing, somehow I my body didn't obey and I found myself waving a limp goodbye from the elevator.
And just a few minutes later I was already thinking what I would have done differently if there could just be a rewind button. A do-over. But you only get do-overs in 6th grade. And his plane leaves tomorrow.
